Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Pornography Behind Numbers


..porn is just INEVITABLE.

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

When I Talk About Stuff I Hate Talking About

If there's one thing that I'm not really comfortable talking about, that would have to be DEATH. i mean there's a heck of a lot to talk about in this world where we are right now. like why people kill one another, how humans have become insatiable in every aspect of life, why men love sex (and so as women) and so on and so forth. it's not that I'm afraid to die, i mean i know that we all are gonna arrive at that latter part of living also known as "dying." it's just that I'm not ready yet. who's ready to die anyways? even some terminally ill are still holding back. they still don't wanna go.

i am very much aware too that no one can really tell when we'll get our reward but one. that's GOD or any higher being that you believe in if by any chance you got one. so we don't really know. what if one day while on your way to school or work you got hit by a car in a breakneck speed? or knock your head off and just die. you don't have time to prepare so to speak. you don't get the chance to finish things. you don't get the chance to do things the way you wanted them to get done. you don't get the chance to repent. unlike with those sick people. people who knew that they're clock is just about to ran out of batteries. they get to put things in their proper places before they leave. don't you find that unfair?

now you might be getting a little bewildered here i know. i just said that i get apprehensive when the topic is about DEATH and here i am making an entry about it. well to tell you honestly even I myself don't understand why. here's the thing. for the longest time I've always wondered whether people who are about to meet the Creator experience some sort of unconscious indications for that matter. like days, weeks, or months before. let's set aside the imminent deaths. I'm talking about the sudden ones. like they get to be more expressive of their affection, or they had this strange feeling of doing things right today. or maybe feeling like they're being probed to spend more time with their loved ones.but they didn't associate these with death per se. they just felt like doing it not knowing it's their final moments.

most of the time, we kid ourselves about death. we don't take this thing seriously. we preoccupy ourselves with the things we want instead of the things we need.but there's a better approach to that. to know that you're going to die and to be prepared for it at any time.

in my favorite book, Tuesdays With Morrie by Mitch Albom, Morrie said that once you learn how to die, you'll learn how to live. we all know that we are going to die. but we just don't believe it. because if we did, we would do things differently. it's hard for us deal with death. why? because according to Morrie we really don't experience the world fully, we are half-asleep, doing things we automatically think we have to do. facing death can pretty much change everything. we would drop all of these and we'd focus on the essentials.

I am not afraid to die. I am afraid to die young.

..we all are gonna die. the question is when and how. Lol.

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Good God, I'm Pregnant; I Wonder Who Did It

One day, a college class was told they had to write a short story in as few words as possible. the instructions were simple but hard. the short story had to contain the following three things.

  • Religion
  • Sexuality
  • Mystery

there was one student who come up with a very brilliant story. it was the only A+ short story in the entire class. it was;

"Good God, I'm Pregnant; I Wonder Who Did It."

..I'm very tired tonight. just got home from duty. gooodnight.

Monday, January 11, 2010

what santa really does while you're asleep

..I've always pictured this fat ass as a dillhole.

Saturday, January 9, 2010

Life as a cup of coffee

I love drinking coffee. but not as much as Kris Aquino does. from what i know, everyday, she would drink like 8 gargantuan cups of coffee. that's everyday man. and yes, that's 8. and i can't imagine getting myself that vast amount of caffeine everyday. I'm pretty much a newb. but i consider myself an addictus already.

every morning, after stumbling out of bed, I'd go straight to the kitchen and make myself a coffee. i couldn't function well until i have a cup. when i get home from school I'd be needing another one to invigorate my entirety. it has like a therapeutic action. whenever i suffer from veisalgia, i would need 3 cups in one single time. it's like my anti-depressant, anti-stress, sedative, anti-anxiety, anesthetic agent and everything. as a matter of fact, as i was doing this entry, I'm enjoying myself with another cup.

i drink coffee anytime, anywhere. morning, afternoon, evening, after eating, inside my room, after squeezing one off, while watching TV, in front of my computer, while watching porn, inside the bathroom while growing a tail, or trimming my pubes, you know. those kinda thing. but the point is, i freaking love coffeeee period.

the reason why i brought up this addiction of mine is because today, i was told a very inspirational story about it. whether or not you had heard about this, i don't know but it was definitely my first time to have heard of it and just had the most considerable thought of sharing it with you. hoping that you'll have the same surge of enlightenment as i did.

so here's the story;

A group of alumni, highly established in their careers, got together to visit their old university professor. Conversation soon turned into complaints about stress in work and life.

Offering his guests coffee, the professor went to the kitchen and returned with a large pot of coffee and an assortment of cups - porcelain, plastic, glass, crystal, some plain looking, some expensive, some exquisite - telling them to help themselves to the coffee.

When all the students had a cup of coffee in hand, the professor said: "If you noticed, all the nice looking expensive cups have been taken up, leaving behind the plain and cheap ones. While it is normal for you to want only the best for yourselves, that is the source of your problems and stress.

Be assured that the cup itself adds no quality to the coffee. In most cases it is just more expensive and in some cases even hides what we drink. What all of you really wanted was coffee, not the cup, but you consciously went for the best cups... And then you began eyeing each other's cups.

Now consider this: Life is the coffee; the jobs, money and position in society are the cups. They are just tools to hold and contain Life, and the type of cup we have does not define, nor change the quality of life we live.

Sometimes, by concentrating only on the cup, we fail to enjoy the coffee. Savor the coffee, not the cups! The happiest people don't have the best of everything. They just make the best of everything. Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly.

..ahhh. soooothing.

Friday, January 8, 2010


Two deaf people got married. during the first week of marriage they find that they are unable to communicate in the bedroom with the lights out since they can't see each other signing or in read lips.

after several months of fumbling around and many misunderstandings, the wife figures out a solution.

she writes;

"honey, why don't we agree on some simple signals? for instance at night, if you want to have sex with me, reach over and squeeze my left breast one time. if you don't want to have sex, reach over and squeeze my right breast two times."

the husband thinks this is a great idea. so he writes back to his wife if she wants to have sex with him, reach over and pull on his penis one time. if she doesn't want to have sex, reach over and pull on his penis two hundred and fifty times.

..that was geeenius!

Learn how to draw an elephant

Today, we will all learn how to draw the massive but cuddly wang elephant.